Last semester, I didn't managed to sit through the remaining papers, I did... poorly. I remembered, my parents accompanied me to take my results. Opened the slip, looked at my CGPA and GPA, my dad didn't say anything.
This semester, I vowed to not let anxious feelings overwhelmed me, to start my assignments early (well, that didn't turn out great), to deal with my spine with proper care, to remember to pray, give thanks. and have more faith and not lean on my own understanding about his plans.
Well, I've made it.
I can never do it without God's peace, and yes, his guidance. I used to study eight hours a day, I can go on sacrificing my sleep, meals, I read from text books, highlight here and there, write notes, and finally the mind-maps. With all those work, I never ever actually complete the recommended readings, nor the extra time to revise. This term, I sleep minimum six hours a day, revised at least 2 times, no extra notes writing, and crazy memorizing, no 6 cups of caffeine...
Lord, without you, I can never ever, almost get 4.00. You proved me nothing is impossible. Lord, forgive me if I grumbles and not thankful about how mercy you are towards me.
I am indeed grateful for my therapist who helped me to go through the abusive memories, sought out the few causation of months of panic attacks, the doctor that help me in monitoring and advising on how to manage my irregular palpitation, my family members that constantly care and provide support, the church members that offer countless of prayers, my friends who took care of me when I need them badly, and lastly - my beloved. Thanks for being so patient.
God, I am not greedy. I want peace for the heart, the mind, and the soul. I would love tips and advises on how to draw near to you.
Thank God.
I never will forget the days I cried out to you, You came to help a pathetic creature - me.
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